I went to the gym on Friday and then skipped Saturday and then went yesterday, Sunday morning and I was going to go today on Memorial Day. There are a couple of reasons holding me back from going.
- Memorial Day Drivers (I don’t want to get into an accident)
- Women’s issues happened to me yesterday evening, but thankfully I am not in a lot of pain. (knock on wood and hope for the best)
- I neglected my laundry with being busy and wanting to rest, but it seems like I keep getting roped into staying busy. This has it’s good and bad points.
- I’m not just making excuses to make excuses.
If I were to go to the gym in this state I would need to wear black pants just in case and well, I ran out and therefore that is why I have to stay home and do laundry. But, I am on a mission. It’s 124 days until my brother’s wedding and I am determined to look good in a dress and look good in the videos and photos. I don’t want to look like a cute potato in a dress. Did I mention I hate wearing dresses? It’s the tomboy in me.
I am also on a new medication that hopefully will help me on this journey and focus this summer to finish the goals I set for myself. I want to lose at least a healthy range of 30 pounds this summer. But, since I am so heavy and with this new medication I do not mind losing 40-50 pounds and then stopping for my body to adjust as long as a lot of inches come off with it. I want to get under the 300 pound mark and so far I have lost like 2-3 pounds. I could weight myself more to see if that I lost more, but lady problems with the bloating prevents me from seeing any progress. I also have a bad habit of not drinking enough water. I used to drink a lot of water when I was younger and I don’t know how I got into the habit of not drinking enough water. I am just not thirsty enough I guess? It’s not the taste. I have a great water system in the home and I have had so many friends suggest water flavorings that are either natural fruits to artificial diabetic friendly flavorings. To be honest though, to flavor my water with any of these options would make me want to drink water less. To me water should be just that…water. Any weird flavorings and subconsciously my brain would start thinking I am trying to poison it.
Also, I wanted to mention that I joined a weight loss program called Real Appeal. I found out about it from work and other co-workers have joined. Now I am not a person to jump on band wagons or jump off the bridge with everyone else like a freaking sheep. But, I decided to try anything once especially when you hear good things. There’s a lot of things I don’t like about it and there are a few things that I do like about it. I got a free kit in the mail with a digital scale, exercise equipment thing (I have no idea what they call it), work books, a plate with color coded portions of how you should eat, exercise dvd’s, and stuff. And then there is the live video classes you can do from your computer or smart phone. The class is thirty minutes and you set up what time you want to join. I’ll keep this blog updated with all that stuff.
Wish me luck!
P.S. That one doctor on my last doctor’s visit on May 3rd pissed me off so I am going to prove I don’t need that medication with the two really bad side effects. I’m going to prove her wrong. I can do this without it.
Posted in blogging, diabetes, Fitness, gym, Uncategorized
Tagged blog, blogger, blogging, Blogs, determination, diet, doctors, exercise, fitness, gym, Health, health and fitness, motivation, motivation monday, Real Appeal, summer fitness, weight, weight loss, weight loss journey
Last night I was feeling frustrated and depressed about food (what I could not have and I possibly was going through withdrawal) and was about to cook a frozen pizza I had in the freezer. I only stock up or eat frozen pizza when money is tight and I can not order it. Yeah, so I have emergency pizza… ^^;
I also was taking a rest day from the gym…which does not help me in anyway of what I did.
Anyway, my mom said she wanted pizza (which is not often) and we wind up ordering out for the first time in a long while. She wound up with an Italian sub sandwich and some brownies for dessert. I wound up with a large sausage cheese pizza. I did not eat the whole thing. I could not eat the whole thing even if I wanted to. I got three slices in and started feeling full. When I was younger I could devour whole large pizzas by myself. As I got older that slowly started to change. My maximum pizza slice eating is usually nowadays five slices on a large, and six on a medium, and let us not talk about small sized pizzas.
I ate three slices last night and maybe around ten ounces of brownie. I really did not measure it. It was as big as my fist. I remember that much. I think my stomach shrunk some. The rest of the pizza is going to my work place for others to devour and finish. So, yes, it’s a minor set back, but are we not all entitled to one cheat meal at some point. One meal is not going to ruin everything. Just like one healthy meal is not going to fix everything.
So I am back on the horse today. So to speak… ^^
Posted in blogging, diet, Uncategorized
Tagged blog, blogger, blogging, Blogs, diet, eat, eating, exercise, fitness, food, gym, Pizza, weight, weight loss
I have talked to many people and friends that have gotten weight loss surgery done. Most of my friends have gotten the sleeve done and I know my aunt an uncle years ago back in the late 80’s or early 90’s (I can not remember) got their stomachs stapled through surgery, lost the weight (mostly) and then gained it back. If I am going to decide to do this I do not want to shell out a 4,000 dollar co-pay from my insurance just for it not to work.
Now what I am about to write about does not apply to people who truly do need the surgery and cannot do it on their own. For example if people have a thyroid problem then yes it is a lot harder to lose weight and in some cases with those problems makes them gain weight. I am sure there are other physical challenges and reasons why, for some people, surgery maybe their only option.
For the rest of us, and yes I do mean us with me included need to get up off our butts and stop being lazy. Surgery is not a crutch of a fix, a quick fix, nor a fix all to patch up laziness which could simply be fixed by changing your diet. I pushed myself to go to the gym twice this week after work. Monday and yesterday I went and did my cardio on Monday and walked on the treadmill on Tuesday. But, I have been working hard for the past two weeks or so. I have lost ten pounds. My family and friends keep telling me that surgery will be the best thing for me, will be a good idea, and the famous “you SHOULD do it” reason! It’s now becoming like a cult/bandwagon thing and I do not know what scares me more is that so many people need/do it or that it looks like a fad/cult culture thing. Not only that, but there is a high rate of people gaining their weight back and/or have many complications. Every body’s body is different, but why put yourself through that and waste time, money, and energy? Plus when you lose weight that fast you’re going to have a lot of hanging loose skin. If you go to the gym and tone up with weights you will still have sagging skin, but not as bad. Then you will have to pay for surgery to get that removed and tucked in. If you tell your insurance it’s not for cosmetic reasons and trust me if you got weight loss surgery at 400 lbs. + there are tons of reasons why it is bad to leave it. Your skin could chaff, there could be bacteria getting in there, and all sorts of things. So that would be another high co-pay of whatever your insurance tells you once you’ve convinced them it is not cosmetic, but actual life saving loose skin removal. I just want to do a one time co-pay for loose skin removal not for both weight loss surgery and that.
I hate doctors and the thought of my stomach being cut into and drastically doing a force change in my life does not sound appealing. My doctor when I spoke with him said I would be perfect candidate. I am all for changing my diet and making smarter choices, but when I was speaking with one of my friends who had gotten the surgery and she lost almost 100 pounds with her surgery (she did the sleeve too) and told me she now cannot eat very much, but she cannot drink any liquids a half an hour before she eats and she has to wait a half an hour after she eats. That is not normal to me. Doctors and health professionals tell you to drink a glass of water before meals so that you’ll fill up more and become full faster. There are other things that do not agree with me that you have to do after surgery. I know I can do this on my own if I stop being lazy and take control of my life. No more stop and go diet and exercise routines because this should be a change of life for me. This should be my new lifestyle and change is apart of life.
Posted in blogging, diet, Fitness, gym, Health, Uncategorized
Tagged bariatric surgery, better life, blog, blogger, blogging, Blogs, change, changing, doctors, eating healthy, exercise, fitness, gym, Health, health and fitness, healthy lifestyle, lap band, lap band surgery, Life, lifestyle, medical, nutrition, rant, sleeve surgery, surgery, weight, weight gain, weight loss, weight loss surgery
Well, while being on break I was able to go to the gym twice. Then tomorrow morning I am going to do my run with my running partner. I got on the scale this morning and it was not pretty. Being on vacation sucks sometimes and you do not realize the damage you do until it is too late. I do not know if I mentioned this in a post before, but I did receive bad news last Saturday on the 8th. Before my test I learned a friend passed away and he had been battling brain cancer for a long time. I gathered my strength and took my test and the irony is that I did better in math than I did in reading. This is ironic because I am better in the language arts than I am in mathematics. I was just seven points away from passing my math. SEVEN!
If studying for a half an hour a week for two months gave me a fourteen point jump from my first scoring in November then I shall have to study harder. I am determined and I can do this to achieve my goals. This also applies to my weight loss journey. I hate calling it “my weight loss journey”. It sounds asinine and I have been depressed about it. I talked to my mother about getting weight loss surgery. I also talked to a friend who had got it done and she lost 87 pounds in six months. My mother thinks I can still do it on my own and I do not need the surgery. I have been trying to do it on my own ever since the sixth grade. I am so frustrated and I hate these diets or to be on a diet. You do not truly want something until you are told you can not have it. There are a lot of mixed feelings about getting weight loss surgery. I also do not want to have surgery only to just gain the weight back.
Sunday, I am cooking Easter dinner and having one of my uncles over for dinner along with mom and myself. Hopefully I will not over cook the turkey. I hope everyone else has a pleasant Easter and good blessings to all.
Posted in blogging, diet, Holidays, Uncategorized, Vacation
Tagged blog, blogger, blogging, Blogs, diet, easter, fitness, gym, Health, Holidays, medical, test, testing, weight, weight loss journey, weight loss surgery, weightloss
I ran this Saturday despite me having a blister underneath my right pinky toe. When I worked out on last Wednesday I tried to take it easy. It is getting better to say the least and on Saturday one of the “run” intervals I actually RAN for twenty seconds and it felt good. I am getting there I guess and then there was talk with my running partner to go to Cedar City, Utah next fall of 2018. Why is that? For a half marathon and then I questioned how long that was, but I should of known it would be 13.1 miles. I have the marathon miles memorized as 26.2 so if it is half because it is a half marathon…eh you get the picture. Now I am training for that half marathon. This gives me at least a year and half to train even if I end up walking half or all of it…to walk half a marathon would be an accomplishment for me.
Posted in 5K race, blogging, C25K, Fitness, gym, Health, Training, Uncategorized
Tagged 13.1 miles, C25K, exercise, fitness, fitness motivation, half marathon, Health, marathon, racing, run, Runner, Runner in Training, running, training, weight, weight loss, weight loss journey, weightloss
I went to see my doctor yesterday and I was more upset yesterday than today. This is because I learned that all my training I did for eight weeks felt like it was for nothing. My doctor was great and all, but I was disappointed at my body because apparently my AC1’s did not budge. They did not budge one bit to my rising feelings of chagrin. My AC1’s are 8.2 and I was not expecting to get back to the seven’s or anything, but at least for it to move one point. The doctor discussed with me about eating right going along with the exercise. I have to change my diet of what I eat. Exercise is only 10% of a healthy life and when trying to lose weight. While, eating is the other 90% is what my doctor was telling me about.
So, we talked about a lot of things and a lot of issues and my mood swings. I’m not going to divulge into the whole enchilada, but when your sugar does a roller coaster of highs and lows so does your moods. There is something else I got diagnosed with (nothing life threatening and I am not dying) and it contributes to that and a few other things. I guess I got a double whammy here and I am still processing it and thinking of a strategy for battle so to speak. I am not a spring chicken anymore, but I am not elderly or old and so I guess I can not do a lot of physical activity and eat whatever. Teens can do this and not change their diet and lose weight and sometimes young adults can do this. I have to re-chart my whole exercise routine and come up with a newer plan.
Posted in blogging, diet, Doctor Visit, Health, Uncategorized
Tagged AC1, diabetes, diabetic, doctor, doctors visit, exercise, food, Health, medical, physical activity, training, weight, weight loss, weight loss journey
Yesterday’s training was to run for 28 minutes… I wound up actually fast walking it because my feet and legs were hurting. Hey, in hindsight I have been doing really great up until the edge of week eight of training. This is why I am going to do the training twice over. I also want to take it easy because on Saturday there is a 5k race that I am running with a friend. Okay, in reality I will probably walk it, but jog some parts of it. I know week eight is brutal because it is the last week.
I have to lose weight. I have to lose weight. I have to lose weight.
I want to incorporate more salads into my diet and veggies and grilled fish for the protein part.
I want to fit into that dress that I saw in the shop and I have a year and half to do it.
Why is this so hard? It is not hard it should be easy, but yet this is proving to be difficult.
Posted in blogging, C25K, Fitness, Health, Training, Uncategorized
Tagged 5k, 5K race, blog, blogging, C25K, diet, fitness, fitness motivation, food, Health, Life, lose weight, run, Runner, Runner in Training, running, training, weight, weight loss
Yesterday, I made the mistake of running uphill in the parking lot. Because I did not realize it was slanted. I pushed my way through even though I verbally told my running partner I was going to die. She reassured me I was not dying and after the run I actually did not literally die, but I felt like I metaphorically died in every sense of the word. My next run is Saturday morning at eight in the morning. Tonight I do my two hours of dancing because I am a glutton for punishment.
In hindsight though, this will all be worth it down the road. If I keep at it and and I do not give up I will then reap the rewards of my efforts. I just have to stay focused and positive…right?
Posted in Fitness, Health, Training, Uncategorized
Tagged blog, blogging, Blogs, C25K, diet, fitness, fitness blog, Health, Health and Diet, inspiration, Life, people, physical fitness, physically fit, run, Runner, Runner in Training, running, training, weight, weight loss, workout
Yesterday I did my run, but this time I am officially calling week four of the C25K app the week of hell. Now it starts getting harder and it pushed my limits and I thought I was going to die. Even if a lot of my muscles were screaming at me I did not falter and stayed in running mode and walking mode when it told me to. I think my running partner is doing better than me, but I am not in competition with her I am in competition with myself. I want to do better from the last year when I did this app and I did complete all eight weeks. So, towards the end of my run yesterday when I had to run for five minute intervals (and I have stated multiple times that when I say run that I jog…so just a reminder) I started to “baby jog” them because I refuse to walk because then what is the purpose of the training? One day I want to be able to actually run and I think I will as soon as the weight comes off. I weighed myself this morning and I weighed 314 pounds. I weighed myself because today is February first. I want to make a goal or a promise that my next weigh in should be March first, and then after that it should just always be the first of every month so that I do not drive myself crazy.
Nothing is ever perfect and neither is diet and exercise. It is a process and when we fall we have to get up, dust ourselves off, and try again. We must learn to be stubborn with ourselves and stay the course. Even if our brains scream “ice cream”! We must not give in. I just want to remind myself of that. If you want something it takes hard work, discipline, and dedication. Rome was not built in a day and so the weight is not going to come off in a day. We must be patient with ourselves and pick ourselves up when we fall or have a bad day, but do not pick up that candy bar or drive through that fast food place. There has to be other ways of coping with stress or a bad day than food. This is geared towards emotional eaters or bored eaters. I mean if you really want something you’ll work for it and find time to do it and if you do not then you’ll find an excuse which means you must really not want it that bad.
Posted in diet, Fitness, Health, Training, Uncategorized
Tagged blog, blogging, C25K, fat runner, fit, fit and healthy, fitness, fitness blog, Health, inspiration, Life, physical fitness, run, Runner, running, training, weight, weight loss