I went to the gym on Friday and then skipped Saturday and then went yesterday, Sunday morning and I was going to go today on Memorial Day. There are a couple of reasons holding me back from going.
- Memorial Day Drivers (I don’t want to get into an accident)
- Women’s issues happened to me yesterday evening, but thankfully I am not in a lot of pain. (knock on wood and hope for the best)
- I neglected my laundry with being busy and wanting to rest, but it seems like I keep getting roped into staying busy. This has it’s good and bad points.
- I’m not just making excuses to make excuses.
If I were to go to the gym in this state I would need to wear black pants just in case and well, I ran out and therefore that is why I have to stay home and do laundry. But, I am on a mission. It’s 124 days until my brother’s wedding and I am determined to look good in a dress and look good in the videos and photos. I don’t want to look like a cute potato in a dress. Did I mention I hate wearing dresses? It’s the tomboy in me.
I am also on a new medication that hopefully will help me on this journey and focus this summer to finish the goals I set for myself. I want to lose at least a healthy range of 30 pounds this summer. But, since I am so heavy and with this new medication I do not mind losing 40-50 pounds and then stopping for my body to adjust as long as a lot of inches come off with it. I want to get under the 300 pound mark and so far I have lost like 2-3 pounds. I could weight myself more to see if that I lost more, but lady problems with the bloating prevents me from seeing any progress. I also have a bad habit of not drinking enough water. I used to drink a lot of water when I was younger and I don’t know how I got into the habit of not drinking enough water. I am just not thirsty enough I guess? It’s not the taste. I have a great water system in the home and I have had so many friends suggest water flavorings that are either natural fruits to artificial diabetic friendly flavorings. To be honest though, to flavor my water with any of these options would make me want to drink water less. To me water should be just that…water. Any weird flavorings and subconsciously my brain would start thinking I am trying to poison it.
Also, I wanted to mention that I joined a weight loss program called Real Appeal. I found out about it from work and other co-workers have joined. Now I am not a person to jump on band wagons or jump off the bridge with everyone else like a freaking sheep. But, I decided to try anything once especially when you hear good things. There’s a lot of things I don’t like about it and there are a few things that I do like about it. I got a free kit in the mail with a digital scale, exercise equipment thing (I have no idea what they call it), work books, a plate with color coded portions of how you should eat, exercise dvd’s, and stuff. And then there is the live video classes you can do from your computer or smart phone. The class is thirty minutes and you set up what time you want to join. I’ll keep this blog updated with all that stuff.
Wish me luck!
P.S. That one doctor on my last doctor’s visit on May 3rd pissed me off so I am going to prove I don’t need that medication with the two really bad side effects. I’m going to prove her wrong. I can do this without it.
Posted in blogging, diabetes, Fitness, gym, Uncategorized
Tagged blog, blogger, blogging, Blogs, determination, diet, doctors, exercise, fitness, gym, Health, health and fitness, motivation, motivation monday, Real Appeal, summer fitness, weight, weight loss, weight loss journey
I got to the gym finally yesterday and it turned my legs into jello. ^^;
Then I tried signing up for some martial arts training and realized my physical health limitations and got really depressed by the end of the day. Maybe I should just train at the gym and when I get closer to my goal and maybe get one thing fixed through surgery I can try again? I know I am not a spring chicken, but when I was younger and did martial arts my nightmares would go away and I would actually sleep well. That was among other improvements I was seeing back then. The wedding is still in September and my brother decided to have it on a Sunday. I guess the venue is cheaper that way because who books a wedding on a Sunday?
Posted in blogging, Fitness, gym, Training, Uncategorized
Tagged blog, blogger, blogging, Blogs, exercise, fitness, Goals, gym, Health, legs, life goals, Martial Arts, physical health, Shotokan, Shotokan Karate, wedding, weight loss, weight loss journey
I ran a bit too hard trying to keep up with my running partner two days ago and my legs are still somewhat sore. I want to do Just Dance 2017, but I think I will wait for tomorrow. I’m starting to get a handle on organizing things and time management. I just finished my homework for my college class. Now I have to study all the Japanese adjectives before Wednesday because we are going to be quizzed on them. Tonight’s dinner is veggie hot dogs. It’s a new brand so I don’t know how they will turn out. Hopefully it will turn out wonderful and I can do away with regular hot dogs.
Because of the run on Saturday I think I also hurt my left foot on the left side of it. When runners run I think they call it a corn or something…or a bunyan? Or whatever runners get. I’ll have a doctor look at it the next time I go in. I need to spend more time in the gym. I am exercising, but I am starting to find things to get my cardio in with out the gym. Either that or things have got me really lazy to actually move to go to the gym. I will figure this out.
Posted in blogging, Fitness, gym, Uncategorized
Tagged blog, blogger, bloggging, Blogs, exercise, gym, Health, run, Runner, running, weight loss, weight loss journey
So I finally made two connections to two things and figured out what was going on after trying to figure out what the cause was for my dizziness. What am I talking about?
Periodically and sporadically, I would get short three minute dizzy spells and on a rarer occasion they last five minutes. I decided to get my blood pressure checked not too long after a dizzy spell yesterday and it came out to 151/87 and they said it was a little high. I then checked it this morning and it was still slightly high…I remember I think it was 131/6…something?
I think my high blood pressure is anxiety/stress induced. I’ve been stressing out a lot these past….well since January.
So now I am in “Operation: Chill out and Calm the Frak down” mode and I also am dieting really hard to get my weight down. Because high blood pressure will go away when you lose weight and on the plus side my diabetes will get better. This past week I also had not had time to exercise so that part is my fault. There should be no excuses. It was and is very scary of this new discovery. I really, really, really do NOT want another medication put on me. I’m also thinking about my father and I’m starting to be like him (health wise) and it makes me more angry than scared.
I know my mom keeps telling me not to worry so much and not to worry about everything. It’s a lot like how you can’t tell a cancer patient to stop having cancer. It doesn’t work that way. Anxiety has to be worked through. You can’t just turn it off and on by sheer will or like a light switch.
I know I have many things to work on and maybe I’ll take it really seriously this time and not pull what my dad pulled and be good for three weeks so not to be put on insulin because he’s afraid of needles and then go back to the way you were and then die anyway.
I am not my father.
I’m still alive.
….I have a lot on my mind.
Posted in blogging, diabetes, Fitness, Health, Uncategorized
Tagged blog, blogger, blogging, Blogs, blood pressure, diabetes, diet, dizziness, doctors, fitness, gym, Health, healthy, high blood pressure, lifestyle, medical, rant, weight loss, weight loss journey
So I have been hitting the gym again as of late and I have dropped a few more pounds. I am down to 307 pounds. I am so close to getting under that 300 so badly I may be taking a few risks so I can get there and then I will diet as normal. I have a doctor’s appointment this Thursday and I visited the vampires today. I know my AC1 levels probably still did not drop, but I am going to give it one more shot before the next AC1 level blood glucose check. Then I will ask for a higher dose on one of my medications and actually pay the higher price because my insurance can be a jerk sometimes.
For those of you who do not know what AC1 levels are all I can explain it is when you are diabetic they take a snapshot of these levels every three to four months (no sooner or later) to keep a watch on your overall blood glucose (blood sugars) in your body. Yes, I still have to test my blood sugar twice a day to make sure I am not too low or too high. But, we need my AC1’s to lower so that I can be healthier. Normal AC1 levels are around 5.5 for normal people. When you get into the 6.0 and higher that’s when you get to the dangerous levels and you need to keep your sugar levels in your blood in check. Mine is 8.2 last time I had blood drawn. I hate taking medications, but if I have to I will and to change that or to add more medications makes me cringe and freak out because I do not like it. But, I digress if it still has not changed and does not change the next time I get my blood drawn in three months then I will ask about upping one of my medications that I take.
Now, if I lose the weight and get healthy and get my blood sugar levels to normal then I can do away with all my medication and live a somewhat normal non diabetic life. This means as explained to me by one of my physicians that he told me that I will always be diabetic…I just won’t have to take any medication. But! I still would have to keep checking my sugar levels just in case. So it is reversible…sort of. Your pancreas is like a car. If you run it into the ground, don’t take care of it, abuse the car it will be in pretty bad shape. You can start taking better care of that car, but it will never be the same as when you bought it brand new from the car store. You can fix it and it will live a healthy car life when you start taking better care of it and yet it will never be the same. You always have to check it to make sure it’s still in good condition. At least this is how that doctor explained it to me because I had told him I had doctors in the past tell me it’s completely reversible since I do not take insulin…yet (at that point in time and I haven’t gotten to that point…yet. thank goodness and I am trying not to.)
So there is your abridged crash course of Diabetes 101. If you have any questions about diabetes or blood sugar levels you can leave them in the comments below. Thank you for your time and patience in reading my blog!
Posted in blogging, diabetes, diet, Doctor Visit, gym, Health, Uncategorized
Tagged AC1, blog, blogger, blogging, Blogs, Blood sugar, diabetes, diabetic, doctor, fitness, gym, gymrat, Health, health and fitness, healthy, personal blog, sugar, weight loss, weight loss journey
Sorry, I know I have not blogged in a long while. I had a small “depression and anxiety spell”. This sometimes happens when it gets closer to the date of when my father passed. I did manage not to completely stop going to the gym. I also got caught up with watching American Ninja Warrior again. I think I want to train for it again and what stopped me last time is I realized heights were actually involved on the show and I am afraid of heights. I want to overcome this fear by getting fit and trying my hand at Spelunking to conquer this fear.
I am afraid of a doctor’s appointment at the end of the month of July. It is not my regular doctor, but a podiatrist and I am not too happy that my regular doctor said since I am diabetic it is now mandatory to see a foot doctor. I’m afraid they will not be very nice and do things to my feet that might be scary and/or painful and I just do not want to go. In other news though I started writing my novel! Yay! Mom is editing the first chapter and I realized I should have double spaced it for easier editing. I am currently writing chapter three….
Yes I can count! Here’s the thing…while editing my mom said my first chapter was too long and broke it up into two. Hence, I need to start writing chapter three. I need to read more books for practice and I know my reading has slowed down, but I will get back on the horse so to speak. Back to the gym tomorrow morning as well. I keep forgetting I have training to do for my half marathon that I am suppose to be able to walk and complete September 2018. When things are really far away into the future I tend to forget about them. ^^;
Good news is I lost ten pounds. 🙂
- Bookshelf Life
- Gamer 4 Life
- Current Obsessions
Posted in blogging, Books and Reading, Doctor Visit, Fitness, gym, half marathon, Health, Summer, Training, Uncategorized, writing
Tagged American Ninja Warrior, blog, blogger, blogging, Blogs, Books, doctor, Doctor Visit, fitness, gym, half marathon, Health, Life, medical, ninja, ninja in training, ninja warrior in training, novel, podiatrist, training, weight loss, weight loss journey, writing
Well, while being on break I was able to go to the gym twice. Then tomorrow morning I am going to do my run with my running partner. I got on the scale this morning and it was not pretty. Being on vacation sucks sometimes and you do not realize the damage you do until it is too late. I do not know if I mentioned this in a post before, but I did receive bad news last Saturday on the 8th. Before my test I learned a friend passed away and he had been battling brain cancer for a long time. I gathered my strength and took my test and the irony is that I did better in math than I did in reading. This is ironic because I am better in the language arts than I am in mathematics. I was just seven points away from passing my math. SEVEN!
If studying for a half an hour a week for two months gave me a fourteen point jump from my first scoring in November then I shall have to study harder. I am determined and I can do this to achieve my goals. This also applies to my weight loss journey. I hate calling it “my weight loss journey”. It sounds asinine and I have been depressed about it. I talked to my mother about getting weight loss surgery. I also talked to a friend who had got it done and she lost 87 pounds in six months. My mother thinks I can still do it on my own and I do not need the surgery. I have been trying to do it on my own ever since the sixth grade. I am so frustrated and I hate these diets or to be on a diet. You do not truly want something until you are told you can not have it. There are a lot of mixed feelings about getting weight loss surgery. I also do not want to have surgery only to just gain the weight back.
Sunday, I am cooking Easter dinner and having one of my uncles over for dinner along with mom and myself. Hopefully I will not over cook the turkey. I hope everyone else has a pleasant Easter and good blessings to all.
Posted in blogging, diet, Holidays, Uncategorized, Vacation
Tagged blog, blogger, blogging, Blogs, diet, easter, fitness, gym, Health, Holidays, medical, test, testing, weight, weight loss journey, weight loss surgery, weightloss
I find myself struggling. I feel my training is what I absolutely need to do and yet I feel worn out, tired, sluggish, and deprived. I say deprived because I know I need to stop eating the bad foods and make better choices. I also feel deprived when I do not train and do the thing that I need to do. Sometimes you have to just make yourself get up and go, or if at all possible do something different. I want to try DDR (Dance Dance Revolution) again and see if I can substitute it for gym time. If I can get at least twenty to thirty minutes of DDR time in today that would be good. At least it’s something different and it is colorful and fun and I really love it. But, on the other hand I miss Ellie at the gym and I call the machine that because it is short for Elliptical. It is my favorite gym machine and I do not know what I would do without it. I need to get out of this funk and I know nothing is instantaneous. I have to keep working at it or I might be forced to use other methods like other medications that was suggested by my doctor. I hate pills, I hate medicine, and if I could get off all my current medication I would be a happy camper.
Music is good therapy for me and so is an hour or two of Minecraft. In Minecraft you have lulling calming music while doing monotonous tasks that either calm you or put you to sleep. It only puts me to sleep if I am tired and I had not gotten sleep previously. There are other ways to cope as well such as writing things down in a diary/journal. If you type personal stuff on a blog it does not have as much meaning/feeling of pouring all the bad/sad/whatever stuff out as physically writing it. Art is the next best thing to express oneself with whatever a person might be going through whether you are good or not. Art can be anything from drawing, sculpting, writing a story/poetry, coloring, cooking (it is in the presentation), and whatever you can make with your own hands and creativity. You can actually combine Minecraft and art by making pixel art with the blocks. I am not very good at pixel art in Minecraft, but a lot of people are and I just sit there in creative mode and play with the blocks and call it “Virtual Legos”. Which, I was not too good at the real thing as a kid. I was the kid that made lopsided houses and weird stuff.
Here’s hope to more positive outlook and thoughts! 🙂
Posted in blogging, diet, Doctor Visit, Fitness, gym, Health, Training, Uncategorized, Video Games
Tagged blog, blogger, blogging, Dance Dance Revolution, DDR, fitness, gym, gym motivation, Health, medicine, Minecraft, Positive thoughts, therapy, training, weight loss, weight loss journey
I ran this Saturday despite me having a blister underneath my right pinky toe. When I worked out on last Wednesday I tried to take it easy. It is getting better to say the least and on Saturday one of the “run” intervals I actually RAN for twenty seconds and it felt good. I am getting there I guess and then there was talk with my running partner to go to Cedar City, Utah next fall of 2018. Why is that? For a half marathon and then I questioned how long that was, but I should of known it would be 13.1 miles. I have the marathon miles memorized as 26.2 so if it is half because it is a half marathon…eh you get the picture. Now I am training for that half marathon. This gives me at least a year and half to train even if I end up walking half or all of it…to walk half a marathon would be an accomplishment for me.
Posted in 5K race, blogging, C25K, Fitness, gym, Health, Training, Uncategorized
Tagged 13.1 miles, C25K, exercise, fitness, fitness motivation, half marathon, Health, marathon, racing, run, Runner, Runner in Training, running, training, weight, weight loss, weight loss journey, weightloss
Bad news…I went to a buffet for dinner last night. The good news is that I did not have three or more plates full of food. I realized I can not eat like I could at a buffet like before. It was one plateful of food and I felt really full. I also had some diet coke because my medicine was making me sick to my stomach. But, once I was eating and sipping the diet coke it got better.
And today I feel like my body is in safe mode. I woke up this morning with cold sweats. I have done this before on occasion. I think the mountain hike yesterday afternoon was a bit much and not because of the walk, but because of the slight altitude change. That could have done something maybe? I roughly enjoyed the hike more so because it was a paved trail, but going back was uphill and I wanted to get to the car faster so I over exerted myself by walking faster. I was not alone because I had a couple of friends with me so no worries. It was a mile mountain trail hike with stuff to read along the way telling you about the trail. It was amazingly quiet up there until other hikers were walking up the walkway.
All in all it was a nice day trip in the late afternoon. I start training at the gym again today after work. Wish me luck! 🙂
Posted in blogging, diet, Health, Uncategorized
Tagged blog, blogger, blogging, Blogs, buffet, fitness, food, Fun, Health, Hiking, Life, mountain, mountains, nature, squirrels, trees, weight loss, weight loss journey