Tag Archives: diabetes

Stress and Health…

So I finally made two connections to two things and figured out what was going on after trying to figure out what the cause was for my dizziness. What am I talking about?

Periodically and sporadically, I would get short three minute dizzy spells and on a rarer occasion they last five minutes. I decided to get my blood pressure checked not too long after a dizzy spell yesterday and it came out to 151/87 and they said it was a little high. I then checked it this morning and it was still slightly high…I remember I think it was 131/6…something?

I think my high blood pressure is anxiety/stress induced. I’ve been stressing out a lot these past….well since January.

So now I am in “Operation: Chill out and Calm the Frak down” mode and I also am dieting really hard to get my weight down. Because high blood pressure will go away when you lose weight and on the plus side my diabetes will get better. This past week I also had not had time to exercise so that part is my fault. There should be no excuses. It was and is very scary of this new discovery. I really, really, really do NOT want another medication put on me. I’m also thinking about my father and I’m starting to be like him (health wise) and it makes me more angry than scared.

I know my mom keeps telling me not to worry so much and not to worry about everything. It’s a lot like how you can’t tell a cancer patient to stop having cancer. It doesn’t work that way. Anxiety has to be worked through. You can’t just turn it off and on by sheer will or like a light switch.

I know I have many things to work on and maybe I’ll take it really seriously this time and not pull what my dad pulled and be good for three weeks so not to be put on insulin because he’s afraid of needles and then go back to the way you were and then die anyway.

I am not my father.

I’m still alive.

….I have a lot on my mind.

Another update!

I ran out of subject lines…

Anyway, now that the weather is getting cooler it means that I can go outside to train. I also decided to give taking that one medicine twice a day another shot. This time though I won’t be eating a lot of junk because I think that led to me living in the bathroom. Well this medicine does make you GO, but amplifying that while eating junk food is NOT a good idea. I need to lower my blood sugar and I really want to do better and I keep forgetting that I really, really, really, really want to fit into a nice dress for my brother’s wedding. I am also trying to lose 12-14 pounds before the 18th of this month and if not  at least inches so I can fit into my jeans to do a cosplay for a thing that weekend. So far since Sunday I lost three pounds of what I was, but I know that’s mostly water weight because I recently was having female issues.

It’s back to the gym for me today and I need to really stop drinking diet soda. I know the bad things it can do, but I did some more updated research today and I was horrified. Aspartame can poison you so much and seriously no human should drink soda. ever.

Once in a blue moon maybe, but not everyday or week. Regular soda has it’s bad side too, but diet soda is worse. I need to free myself from my addiction to Diet Dr. Pepper Cherry.

In another development I seem to not like ice cream any more. It’s not the texture, but the flavor (even if it’s super chocolatey) just doesn’t do it for me anymore. I’ve been trying for a couple of months taste testing. I know what your thinking… “this is a good thing! You’re diabetic you idiot you shouldn’t be eating that stuff anyway!” Well you’re right, but once in awhile I want to indulge. At first I thought it was allergies or I was getting a cold. Because you can’t taste crap when you start to get a cold, but that wasn’t it. Then my next conclusion was either:

A. My taste buds are changing

B. The increase in that one medication is changing things.

C. I burnt my taste buds one too many times on hot foods because I was super hungry and couldn’t wait.

D. All of the above

There can be a number of things why.

Tonight’s dinner will be a healthy one of baked salmon with lemon pepper seasoning and some steamed veggies. So it’s one step in the right direction.

It’s almost Halloween time…

Tomorrow is Halloween and I have the pleasure of doling out sugary treats among the masses to little humans dressed up as imaginary and fictitious characters. Hopefully I myself do not slip into a sugary coma myself because a diabetic coma would not be good. After Halloween I want to lose 11 pounds by November 18th and I think I can do that. I’m all gung ho about this because I need to fit into my old pair of jeans for a cosplay for a convention that weekend.

Anyway, the bigger plan for Halloween night is to also watch scary thrillers and Halloween themed movies while gorging on air popped popcorn drizzled in melted butter. I learned my lesson last year not to be pre-occupied by gaming because it was a hassle to keep getting up and down from my game cave to the front door. This wasn’t a physical challenge as it was more a hearing challenge. I couldn’t hear the door bell from my game cave. I want to dress up as something when I answer the door, but I figure I don’t want to because I am lazy. If I was going to a Halloween party then that is a different story.

I hope everyone’s Halloween night is fun and exciting. Make sure to make smart choices and be safe.

Then this happened…

I saw my doctor after work yesterday and turns out my A1C (not AC1…apparently I am slightly dyslexic when I can’t sleep) actually did drop down! Not by much, but it’s better than the last three blood work appointments. The nurse was wrong and it was not 8.2 anymore, but 8.1! Finally! Like I said I’ll take what I can get right now and now at least all my hard work is finally starting to pay off. I also noticed while I go to the gym whether sporadically or on point like I am suppose to I’ve been getting my protein from eggs which keeps me from having the munchies and being hungry. One of my friends pointed out when one time last year when I started going to the gym again after not going that I couldn’t understand why I was so hungry. She explained I needed more protein and that would curb the hungry/munchies. I can’t always get my hands on chicken let alone fish because fish is more expensive. So eggs is the next best thing to get my hands on for protein. I realize other foods have protein too, but I love eggs better even though it’s not one of my favorite foods. Eggs are just the easiest thing for me to cook in the morning before work.

That’s where we are right now. I’ll keep everyone posted and it turns out this summer I did lose a total of ten pounds. I hope to keep this up and lower my blood sugar further. It’s a start….

Back at the Gym

So I have been hitting the gym again as of late and I have dropped a few more pounds. I am down to 307 pounds. I am so close to getting under that 300 so badly I may be taking a few risks so I can get there and then I will diet as normal. I have a doctor’s appointment this Thursday and I visited the vampires today. I know my AC1 levels probably still did not drop, but I am going to give it one more shot before the next AC1 level blood glucose check. Then I will ask for a higher dose on one of my medications and actually pay the higher price because my insurance can be a jerk sometimes.

For those of you who do not know what AC1 levels are all I can explain it is when you are diabetic they take a snapshot of these levels every three to four months (no sooner or later) to keep a watch on your overall blood glucose (blood sugars) in your body. Yes, I still have to test my blood sugar twice a day to make sure I am not too low or too high. But, we need my AC1’s to lower so that I can be healthier. Normal AC1 levels are around 5.5 for normal people. When you get into the 6.0 and higher that’s when you get to the dangerous levels and you need to keep your sugar levels in your blood in check. Mine is 8.2 last time I had blood drawn. I hate taking medications, but if I have to I will and to change that or to add more medications makes me cringe and freak out because I do not like it. But, I digress if it still has not changed and does not change the next time I get my blood drawn in three months then I will ask about upping one of my medications that I take.

Now, if I lose the weight and get healthy and get my blood sugar levels to normal then I can do away with all my medication and live a somewhat normal non diabetic life. This means as explained to me by one of my physicians that he told me that I will always be diabetic…I just won’t have to take any medication. But! I still would have to keep checking my sugar levels just in case. So it is reversible…sort of. Your pancreas is like a car. If you run it into the ground, don’t take care of it, abuse the car it will be in pretty bad shape. You can start taking better care of that car, but it will never be the same as when you bought it brand new from the car store. You can fix it and it will live a healthy car life when you start taking better care of it and yet it will never be the same. You always have to check it to make sure it’s still in good condition. At least this is how that doctor explained it to me because I had told him I had doctors in the past tell me it’s completely reversible since I do not take insulin…yet (at that point in time and I haven’t gotten to that point…yet. thank goodness and I am trying not to.)

So there is your abridged crash course of Diabetes 101. If you have any questions about diabetes or blood sugar levels you can leave them in the comments below. Thank you for your time and patience in reading my blog!

The Doctor Visit

I went to see my doctor yesterday and I was more upset yesterday than today. This is because I learned that all my training I did for eight weeks felt like it was for nothing. My doctor was great and all, but I was disappointed at my body because apparently my AC1’s did not budge. They did not budge one bit to my rising feelings of chagrin. My AC1’s are 8.2 and I was not expecting to get back to the seven’s or anything, but at least for it to move one point. The doctor discussed with me about eating right going along with the exercise. I have to change my diet of what I eat. Exercise is only 10% of a healthy life and when trying to lose weight. While, eating is the other 90% is what my doctor was telling me about.

So, we talked about a lot of things and a lot of issues and my mood swings. I’m not going to divulge into the whole enchilada, but when your sugar does a roller coaster of highs and lows so does your moods. There is something else I got diagnosed with (nothing life threatening and I am not dying) and it contributes to that and a few other things. I guess I got a double whammy here and I am still processing it and thinking of a strategy for battle so to speak. I am not a spring chicken anymore, but I am not elderly or old and so I guess I can not do a lot of physical activity and eat whatever. Teens can do this and not change their diet and lose weight and sometimes young adults can do this. I have to re-chart my whole exercise routine and come up with a newer plan.

Happy Valenti…NOPE!

…Happy Single’s Awareness Day! Well, actually it is tomorrow officially and then unofficially it is celebrated whenever the hell you feel like in February. I plan on officially celebrating on Saturday. I am having a cheat day and I had ordered fancy cakes from a bakery a few weeks ago to be delivered.  Truth be told though, have been cheating here and there and only lost a few pounds and inches. Imagine if I got rid of all the temptation how really great I would be doing!

I have not faltered from my exercise routine, except last Friday I did not attend my dance class, but this was because it was my uncle’s birthday and I had to cook and stuff. I was told two days before that it was being held at my place. Apparently this is a thing that is done in my family and in itself is a tradition. If this is a tradition you would think I would anticipate it better, but I did not remember my uncle’s birthday. Yes, that sounds horrible, but I have a lot on my plate in life right now.

After this week I am going to really buckle down…you know before Easter rolls around. ^_^;;

The sweets are too good and that is all my brain keeps screaming at me especially when a holiday like this is around makes it worse. This is not just a battle, but this is a war that I must win at all costs. I refuse to celebrate Valentine’s Day since I am single and I have a valid reason for being cynical today. The flowers, candy, balloons, couples PDA, and yes even television betrays me with a plethora of romance films. In these romance films there are five set reused plots that are used over and over again making these movies very predictable. Who ever watches these should get a gold star and a merit badge, because I do not know how they can have the time, brain capacity, or attention span to watch them. If it makes you happy to watch them good for you and all that jazz, but they are not for me and they are not my cup of tea. If by chance someone does not reuse one of the five reusable plots, and does a new love story plot that is not predictable, I would like to know about it and I might give it a watch.

I took a handful of film classes while I was in college and now I can see stuff in film and television that the critics see. This has either ruined watching film/TV for me or it has enhanced it because now I see things differently because of my experiences from those classes. If you are serious about being in the film business or doing television and you either want to learn or take some classes be warned. You’ll never look at film or television shows again in the same way.

Romance is way overrated and being single can be a great thing! You can do whatever you want and when you want! You do not have to worry about considering the other person or compromising. Sure, there are down sides to being single too like being lonely or wanting the touch of another. There are also down sides to being in a relationship too. There are pros and cons with anything. If you are single you have no ties to anyone and can do anything. Love yourself and celebrate it and be grateful and happy about the body you are in. Have fun with being single and if you are with that special someone celebrate and cherish each other everyday and not just on this holiday that was created by the card, flower, and candy companies. Life is short kids…live every moment like it is your last!

 

C25K: Week 5 – Day 2 and 3 combined

Sorry, I didn’t post after day two or three for week five because it was crazy this week. I didn’t think it would change on day three of this week, but it did and totally wiped me out. It was a five minute warm up and then a twenty minute run without ANY walking breaks and then the five minute cool down. I run better in the morning after having slept and I have not had breakfast yet. It was not that horrible, but yet my legs screamed at me later. I am also having a hard time keeping my sugar levels down. I mean they are down, but sometimes they are high. I need to lay off the sweets, but I am so addicted! No one is perfect and after this up coming weekend will be the last of it. Even though I would like to blame Valentine’s Day the real fault is mine and I need to step it up a bit. I have an appointment in March where I get my blood drawn and see the doctor to see where my AC1 levels are at. Wish me luck!

C25K: Week 5 – Day 1

Yesterday’s run was interesting. I think on the intervals I had to run I did some slow running. Week five was not so bad, but yet it was still difficult at the same time. I do not know how that is possible, but trust me it was possible and I felt better about running the first interval of the new week. I still thought I was going to die towards the end rather than the beginning of the run.

I also was getting some foot pain while running. The pain was minimal and I think that maybe due more towards the fact that I need to use lotion on my feet rather than blame it on the diabetes. I should not dismiss that the disease is the cause of the pain though. I do need to be careful because if I do get an injury then instead of taking one day off it might turn into week or more. I do not want that because it will drive me crazy.

In other news I still need to force myself to drink more water. I do not know why it is hard for me to do that when I was younger I drank water like a camel. I know as we all get older things change like your body, mind, and food likes. I have to remind myself I am not a spring chicken anymore. It is true that you are young as you feel and age is just a number, but that takes care of your mental health. Your mental health and how you feel are important. This does not give you the license to do a cannonball off the high dive and do some foolish daredevil stunt like you are twelve again. You are not twelve so do not do stupid stuff that has a high possibility of you breaking bones, spraining something, or getting some other horrible injury. If you get injured how can you keep training?

I am not a kid, I am not a teenager, I am not even a young adult, and I am not elderly either just to be clear. I am somewhere in the middle trying to find my middle ground. I am trying to find my space to exist in and a place where I can breathe comfortably in my own skin.